🤣 Family-Friendly Jokes

[Zalex108]

@Catweazle

[Zalex108]

@Gwen-Dragon said in Family-Friendly Jokes Thread:

@Catweazle I like this!

[Catweazle]

[Catweazle]

There are really worrisome traffic cameras

[Catweazle]

How To Fix a Water Damaged Laptop

[Zalex108]

@Catweazle

Series | iHam

[Pesala]

I think this thread is wandering off topic. It is supposed to be for jokes, not links to videos.

Q: Why couldn't Mary and Joseph join the hotel conference call?
A: There was no Zoom at the inn.

[Catweazle]

During a visit to a Psychiatric Clinic, one of the visitors asked the Director what criteria were used to define whether or not a patient should be admitted.

'Well,' said the Director, we do the following test: - 'We fill a bathtub, then we offer the patient a teaspoon, a cup and a bucket and we ask him to empty the bathtub. Depending on how you empty the bathtub, we know if you have to admit it or not '

Ah, I understand- said the visitor. - A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon and the cup.

'No,' said the Director. -A normal person would remove the cap. What do you prefer: a room with or without a view? ...

[Pesala]

Too subtle for kids?

A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked into a blood donation clinic.

The nurse asked the rabbit, "What is your blood type?"

"I am probably a type O," said the rabbit.

[Pesala]

Lunar Eclipse

[MoonDawg]

@i_ri

cheese , foot , ball of yarn ------- DOES NOT GO HERE

[Pesala]

The End

[Catweazle]

[MoonDawg]

Why did the tap dancer retire?
He kept falling in the sink.

What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?
The banana split.

How do you stop a snake from striking?
Pay it decent wages.

What starts with E, ends with E but usually has one letter?
An envelope.

Why wouldn't they let the butterfly into the dance?
Because it was a moth ball.

What do whales eat?
Fish and ships.

[WildEnte]

"Dad, I can calculate super fast!" - "Really? Alright, what is 3+5?" - "Nine!" - "That's wrong!" - "Yeah, but super fast!"

[Catweazle]

[MoonDawg]

James Clerk Maxwell and Michael Faraday were traveling together on the Caledonian Express. Outside it was pouring rain. Maxwell pointed to a fellow in a red cap and uniform standing near an open window.

"That trainman is incompetent," Maxwell said. "He collects no tickets and calls out the wrong names for all the stations. Mostly all he does is lean against the window with his eyes shut. What a disgrace to the railway!"

Suddenly a flash of lightning entered the carriage through the window and hit the trainman directly. The current bounced off him and leapt to the floor. Miraculously, the man was completely unscathed.

"How did he survive?" asked an astonished Faraday.

"Aye, that’s simple," said Maxwell. "He’s a bad conductor."

[Catweazle]

https://streamable.com/it3sgw

[Pathduck]

Telecommunications in nature:

Watch out for that independent observer!

[MoonDawg]

@pathduck

Ba-a-nary Code works ok!